Heart fatigue.
Is that a thing?
Exhausted from feeling all the feelings.
Wishing for more support.
More love.
More understanding.
Less judgment.
Less abandonment.
Less projection.
Less judgment.
(Yes, I said it again.)
I was there for you, and you, and you.
But you need only light and happy now that it’s my time of need.
I’m too dark.
Too interested in processing pain.
And personal growth.
It makes you uncomfortable.
And you’re not one for discomfort.
Neither am I.
But I am committed to myself.
To getting better.
And becoming a better human.
And the only way out is through.
And alone, apparently.
It’s okay.
I can do alone.
I’m good at alone.
I like alone.
And the peace of my alone is so much better than the loneliness of our togetherness.
Because my heart is fatigued.
And I need to conserve my energy for processing and healing now.
Healing five years of wounds that festered while I attended to others.
The silence is deafening, but not unwelcome.
Creating a cocoon of quiet that allows me to hear the whispers.
And leads me toward what I need.
Instead of what others need from me.
Heart fatigue is a thing.
But it’s time for her to rest now.
And begin healing.